Skip to main content

Loving Awful People

You have heard that it was said, “Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.” But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? (Matthew 5:43-47)
There is nothing distinctly Christian about loving those who love you, or loving the lovely. To convey this point, Jesus chose a class of people despised by the Jews (tax collectors) and said, “Tax collectors love like that. They are not believers and they are not moral, but they love those who love them.” So when a Christian loves those who love him, all he is doing is something that is natural to man. That is not a Christian characteristic. Rather, it is something God created everyone with, including the worst type of criminal.

You exhibit your Christianity, or your Christian love, when you obey the command to love the unlovely. If you have never loved your enemy and have loved only lovely people, you have been disobedient. Why? Because this quality of love is central to Christian behavior and can be exercised only by obedience. You never fall into it. The kind of love you fall into is a characteristic of the natural man. Even your friendships are characteristic of the natural man. Loving the unlovely is peculiar to Christians alone. They have to choose to do it because it does not happen to them.

How do you love unlovely people? How do you love your enemies? Love in the Scripture is always volitional. It is something you always have to choose to do because it is commanded. It will not happen automatically. If you are sitting around waiting to feel loving thoughts towards your enemies, you will be waiting a long time.

I became a Christian when I was in my second year in the Naval Academy. I found that one of my first new characteristics was that I loved my roommate, and he was not lovely. Three weeks went by and he said, “OK, Wilson, what happened? The last three weeks you have been unbearably pleasant.”

I saw my love expand to people, like my roommate, whom I had not loved before because I had received this kind of love when I received Jesus Christ. He filled me with it, and now I could vent it, by choice. But it had nothing to do with whether my roommate was lovely. It was based on the love of God in me. I began to see my love expand for more and more types of people. But a few years later, I ran into a type of person that I did not like. In fact, I despised them.

I graduated in June of 1950, had thirty days leave, and went right to the Korean War. We stopped at Sasebo, Japan, for refueling. There were three thousand prostitutes in the first three blocks. It was the same in Yokosuka. I was witnessing on the ship and leading men to Christ. They would go ashore and come back with gonorrhea. I hated these women. You could not walk down the street without being grabbed. I had this unlove for these women for years, and I knew I had it.

I was on an aircraft carrier in Hong Kong and had invited some missionary friends out to dinner on the ship. I told them I had this problem of lack of love. The wife said, “You have it all wrong. You are commanded to love those people. It is not something that happens. It is something you choose to do in obedience to God.”

I knew what the Scripture said, and I knew she was right. I went to my room that night in one great turmoil of rebellion. How do you do it? Do you go out and say, “OK, I choose to obey. I will love them if it kills me!” By an act of the will do you crank it up? Do you put it into effect by sheer willpower? I knew that was not right, because the Scripture requires unfeigned, genuine love. No one would be fooled by fake love. I was willing to say, “Lord, if you want them loved, you will have to love them through someone else. I don’t have it, I can’t fake it, and I don’t know how to obey without faking it.”

But as I prayed that night, I realized several things. If loving is a command, then not loving is disobedience. If it is disobedience, then it is sin. If it is sin, then it is forgivable. We cannot begin to obey until we recognize the issue of sin and receive forgiveness.

I had never considered that this business of not loving my enemies is in the same category as lying. The great commandment is to love God, and the Scripture says, “He who says he loves God and loves not his brother is a liar.” When I have unlove for others, I do not love God. If the great commandment is to love God and I am not obeying the great commandment, how great a sin is it? It is a big sin. If loving my neighbor is the second commandment and I am not doing it, I am guilty of another big sin. These are commandments, and if I am not doing them, I am disobedient. Does that mean I live in guilt? No, it means I must receive forgiveness. But I must recognize what my sin is before I can get forgiven.

That night I confessed all my unlove, and God forgave me. Wonderful! That did not make me loving, but it did make me clean. It brought me up to neutral, a position from which I could love. If I had decided to love these prostitutes in the presence of my sin of unlove, I could not have done it. But I was forgiven for my unlove. From a clean position, I chose to love those women. I said, “God, You had better meet me before I meet them or it is going to come out phony.”

When I chose to obey the commandment, God gave me a great love for these people - His love. God’s love does not condone sin, so I did not condone their sin. But now I could see them as those for whom Christ died.

Note for readers: This is the last blog post for this week. Lord willing, I will get back to blogging next week after the Thanksgiving holiday.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Getting Old

This is a post for those who are getting old or considering themselves old, from 65-100. Right now, I am 91.* I will be 92 in October. I have my own house, but I cannot live in it alone because of my physical inability to move around. One of my sons lives with me. All of us will have to make some adjustments. That includes money, relatives, your own ability and willpower to stay independent, etc. My advice is if physically and financially you can live independently, you should certainly do that. If you do, you will still need to have visits from your family frequently. You need your family. Even if you don’t need them to take care of you, you need them for the fellowship. The more fellowship you have, the longer you’ll live. If you can stay independent do it, but only if friends and relatives can see you often. In my case, I can’t walk, and I can’t do much physically. So, whether I like it or not, someone else has to get me up, get me showered, and get me dressed. I am blessed to have

Why Is Obedience So Hard?

There are several reasons why obedience seems hard. I will comment on some of them and then speak positively on how obedience is easy. We think: 1) Obedience is an infringement on freedom. Since we are free in Christ, and obedience is somehow contrary to that freedom, we conclude that obedience is not good. Yet we know it is good. Thus, we become confused about obedience and are not single-minded. 2) Obedience is works. We who have been justified by grace through faith are opposed to works; therefore, we are opposed to obedience. 3) We have tried to obey and have failed—frequently. Therefore, the only solution is to disobey and later confess to receive forgiveness. It is easier to be forgiven by grace than to obey by effort. 4) We confuse obedience to men with obedience to God. Although these are sometimes one and the same (see Romans 13, 1 Peter 2-3, Ephesians 5-6, Colossians 3, and Titus 2), sometimes they are not the same (see Colossians 2:20-23, Mark 7, 1 Timothy 4:1-5, a

Three Types of People Christians Aren't Loving

There are three types of people in the world that Christians do not love with the Gospel . The first type are the people we witness to but do not love. The second type are the unbelievers that we do not witness to. The third are people we love but do not witness to. That sounds like doubletalk. Let’s change it. 1) We witness to people we love. 2) We love everybody and witness to them with love. As Christians, we have the fruit of the Spirit—love. We are commanded to love our neighbors and our enemies. The first thing is to have the love. The second is to choose to love our neighbors and enemies. Sometimes we can’t make the choice because we have lost the fruit of the Spirit, love. We lack the fruit of the Spirit of love because we are under the chastening of the Lord because of unconfessed sin. In order to get the love back, we must confess sin. Once we get the love back, we can choose to love our neighbors and enemies and preach the gospel to them.   Written December 22,