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Getting Old


This is a post for those who are getting old or considering themselves old, from 65-100.

Right now, I am 91.* I will be 92 in October. I have my own house, but I cannot live in it alone because of my physical inability to move around. One of my sons lives with me.

All of us will have to make some adjustments. That includes money, relatives, your own ability and willpower to stay independent, etc. My advice is if physically and financially you can live independently, you should certainly do that. If you do, you will still need to have visits from your family frequently. You need your family. Even if you don’t need them to take care of you, you need them for the fellowship. The more fellowship you have, the longer you’ll live. If you can stay independent do it, but only if friends and relatives can see you often.

In my case, I can’t walk, and I can’t do much physically. So, whether I like it or not, someone else has to get me up, get me showered, and get me dressed. I am blessed to have three sons who take turns doing that.

The next best thing is to move in with one of your children or one of your brothers or sisters. That may be a hardship for them, so if you have any money at all, contribute to the upkeep that you require.

When you get to this age, you have to make decisions. It is very likely that you won’t want the decisions that your children make for you. I don’t have a solution for that. Whatever you do, don’t do it in rebellion. Do it very positively. Whatever the solution is, take it as God’s provision.

Whether you stay at home or in someone else’s home or in an elder care residence, participate in any Bible studies or worship services that you can. If you’ve never been interested in that, you might want to get interested. These people are Christians. They may be very warm Christians, and you need that warmth and fellowship. Even if you haven’t been to church or a Bible study before, go for it.

If your relatives are not in the same town, stay in touch with them, either by writing to them or by telephone. You need that contact.

I have a friend I’ve known for many, many years. She was a Navy nurse in Japan and became a Christian at that time. She’s now 96 years old and lives in Charleston, SC. Periodically, she calls me. I’m in Moscow, Idaho. She doesn’t call me because we’re relatives (we’re not). She calls me because we are friends, and she needs to stay in touch with her friends. It’s a healthy thing. It’s very easy to live your life without friends. Pretty soon, they just disappear from your life. That is not a healthy thing. Stay in touch with your friends. Some of your friends may have become widows or widowers, and perhaps they have married someone else that you don’t know. Reach out and get to know your friends’ new spouses. They need you as much as you need them.

If your relatives’ children live some distance from you, telephone and write to them often. If you reach out to them often, they will respond to you often. When you are in touch with them, ask them all kinds of questions about all of their children and all of their relatives so you get the news about everyone you used to know well.

The major thing in all this is that you are a human being, and people are created by God to be with other people. Make it a point to stay in touch. Even if it’s only one person, it will be a lifeline.


*Written July 2, 2019.

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