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Divorce: Willful Sins & Great Transgression

Dear R,

A few weeks ago, I found out that you planned on divorcing your wife. If so, I realize that things have had to be going bad for a long time.

Whether you remain married or get a divorce, you are going to have to have the joy of the Lord’s salvation returned to you. It has to be a long time since you have had it. The same for her. You both have been sinning against God for a long time.

If you divorce, you may be free from the temptation that she provided. That just means you are setting yourself up for other temptations which you may not be able to resist.

I know Satan well. He will have another woman waiting in the wings for you. She will be sympathetic and respectful and seem to be everything you perceive that your wife is not. However, she will be: 1) not a Christian, 2) a back-slidden Christian, 3) divorced or planning on a divorce, or 4) looking for a husband, 5) an easy make, or 6) a combination of the above. She will have a hard time loving your children, and they will not make it easy for her.

“Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression” (Psalm 19:13).

This is very important information. It tells us that great transgressions will never happen if willful sins do not get dominion over you. The great transgression of divorce tells me that you have had accumulated willful sins which got dominion over you which you have not confessed, repented of, and been forgiven for.

Our only enemy in this world is Satan. He is rebellious and a liar. His object is to get the saints to shoot at each other. He has succeeded and convinced you both that the other one is the enemy.

The reasons you were rejoicing when you first became a Christian are: all of your sins were forgiven, you were indwelt with the Holy Spirit, and your name was written in the Book of Life. The reason you are more unhappy now is that you are being disciplined by God for your sins.

“And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: ‘My sons, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.’ Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Heb. 12:5-11).

This discipline is evidence that you are a child of God. Unbelievers do not get disciplined for sin. Christians do; they are unable to enjoy sin like unbelievers.

There are two kinds of people who are in trouble: those who cannot keep from sinning and those who can keep from sinning but will not.

People either cannot obey God or will not obey God. The first is a description of an unbeliever. The second is a description of a believer. To the best of my knowledge, you are a believer with no joy. The solution is to come to God in repentance for all of the willful sins and all of the resultant great transgressions.

You may be involved in such a way that you think you cannot extricate yourself, like you have given your word. Remember, you gave your word to your wife before God and witnesses.

I hope to be in touch with you. In the meantime, I will pray.

Your friend in Jesus Christ,

Jim Wilson

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